I am in complete peace, while existing in the form of total darkness, total silence and total loneliness. The days I longed for light, longed for sound and longed for reference were the days when I was outside of darkness, silence and loneliness. Only if I decomposed once more, I would have longed for light, sound and reference again.
Time could be thousands of years before or thousands of years after or whatever. I am able to think but I can not judge what is the time I am thinking in.
Maybe I was thinking while I was still living.
Somewhere inside of me, there is a tiny spot having a slightly different shade than the rest. It is different than total darkness, total silence and total loneliness. It is not shining but it is not in total darkness, there is no sound but it is not completely silent, it is not something but it is not nothing either. It reminds me of a blue sailing boat once I had seen, between a grey sea and a grey sky.
It must be coming from the depths of that different shade: I sense a slightest vibration. Some people have already said or will someday say “All there is in universe is the vibration of strings” which make me understand why we are in harmony with music when we are outside silence, with light when we are outside darkness and with matter when we are outside loneliness.
Strange to say, without understanding the reason, I appreciate that different shade. Appreciate that it exists, had existed and will always have been existed.
I would feel tears in my eyes, if only I had eyes.
